V FOR VENDETTA
2005
*
In a future totalitarian England, a terrorist dressed as Guy Fawkes threatens the State.
Shallow and dull sci-fi satire that displays political naivety but conjures up some memorable images. Hurt’s performance is particularly silly.
Dir: Andy Wachowski, Larry Wachowski
Stars: Natalie Portman, Hugo Weaving, Stephen Rea, Stephen Fry, John Hurt, Tim Pigott-Smith, Rupert Graves
VALENTINO
1977
*
Mourners at silent film idol Rudolph Valentino’s funeral remember his short existence.
A near fantasia on the actor’s life almost crippled by an unsuitable lead (you could never believe this man held millions of women entranced), but rescued by some cinematic flair and opulence in the sets and costumes – despite many gripes, it seems churlish not to concede that Russell was a good man for the job, despite what he himself thought. Was the final boxing sequence added in the wake of Rocky’s success?
Dir: Ken Russell
Stars: Rudolf Nureyev, Michelle Phillips, Leslie Caron, Carol Kane
THE VALLEY OF GWANGI
1968
*
Cowboys discover prehistoric monsters in a forbidden Mexican valley.
First class special effects enliven an elementary adventure yarn.
Dir: Jim O'Connolly
Stars: Richard Carlson, Laurence Naismith, James Franciscus
VAMP
1987
*
Two teenagers go in search of a stripper and find a nightclub run by vampires.
Superior horror comedy, imaginatively lit and bursting with energy.
Dir: Richard Wenk
Stars: Grace Jones, Chris Makepeace, Sandy Baron
VAMPIRA
1974
0
Count Dracula revives his dead wife with the aid of a Playboy bunny.
Horror comedy which never begins to work. Some nice period touches but no laughs, scares or sexiness.
Dir: Clive Donner
Stars: David Niven, Teresa Graves, Linda Hayden, Bernard Bresslaw, Veronica Carlson, Jennie Linden, Peter Bayliss, Freddie Jones
THE VAMPIRE
1957
0
A doctor turns into a monster after taking certain pills which he becomes addicted to.
Flat low budget horror with a wee bit more in the way of underlying message than some others (addiction, single parenthood etc), but little else to suggest it was a new and exciting direction for the genre. The lead’s one-note, boy-I’m-feeling-ill performance doesn’t help matters.
Dir: Paul Landres
Stars: John Beal, Coleen Gray, Kenneth Tobey
VAMPIRE AT MIDNIGHT
1987
0
A hypnotist is really a vampire who preys on women.
Mainly routine shocker; and it could have lost the couple of sequences where the cast dance.
Dir: Gregory McClatchy
Stars: Jason Williams, Gustav Vintas
THE VAMPIRE BAT
1932
0
A man investigates mysterious deaths in a small town.
Cheap, dated horror that offers the modern viewer very, very little. Shame, because the cast isn’t bad.
Dir: Frank Strayer
Stars: Lionel Atwill, Fay Wray, Melvyn Douglas, Dwight Frye
VAMPIRE CIRCUS
1971
*
In 1825, a circus of vampires comes to a plague-ridden town.
Imaginative if slightly plodding Hammer horror that comes packaged with gore, a little sex and bad special effects. The main problem is that while the set-up is quite original, the plot development isn’t, and it’s not one of the studio’s most distinguished casts.
Dir: Robert Young
Stars: Adrienne Corri, Thorley Walters, Laurence Payne, Lynne Frederick, Dave Prowse
VAMPIRE IN VENICE
1988
0
An ancient vampire returns to terrorise Venice.
Ponderous piece of pretentious piffle.
Dir: Augusto Caminito
Stars: Klaus Kinski, Donald Pleasence, Christopher Plummer
THE VAMPIRE LOVERS
1970
*
A female vampire worms her way into houses of nobility.
The first of Hammer’s lesbian vampire movies is a moderate production, a little bit classy and quite erotic but short on thrills. Not bad, but no classic.
Dir: Roy Ward Baker
Stars: Ingrid Pitt, Madeline Smith, Kate O’Mara, Peter Cushing, George Cole, Dawn Addams, Pippa Steel
VAMPIRELLA
1996 (V)
0
A female space vampire comes to Earth to battle her nemesis, now a rock star.
Terrible screen version of the long-running comic, it needed another £20 million on the budget to be anything approaching decent; script, special effects and acting are all of the very lowest quality, and they didn’t even get the casting of Vampirella right, choosing a non-curvy, albeit beautiful, actress to portray the sexy space lady.
Dir: Jim Wynorski
Stars: Talisa Soto, Roger Daltrey, Richard Joseph Paul, Brian Bloom
VAMPIRES ON BIKINI BEACH
1987 (V)
0
Sunbathing teenagers are menaced by a modern blood-sucker.
With a title like this you'd expect this to be utter drivel. And you'd be right.
Dir: Mark Headley
Stars: Nancy Rogers, Todd Kaufman
VAMPIRES SUCK
2010
0
A teenage girl moves to a new town where she falls in love with a pale vampire youth in a long coat.
The men behind the likes of Disaster Movie and Epic Movie spoof Twilight, and the results are as lame as expected. Not funny at any given moment, its main audience will be easily pleased teenagers.
Dir: Jason Friedberg, Aaron Seltzer
Stars: Jenn Proske, Matt Lanter, Diedrich Bader, Chris Riggi
VAMPYR
1931
**
A young man staying at a remote hotel suspects he is surrounded by vampires.
Scary, seminal horror; it's unlikely that any film will ever be able to re-create the misty, dreamy, terrifying atmosphere.
Dir: Carl Dreyer
Stars: Julian West, Sybille Schmitz
VAMPYRES
1974
*
Men are lured to an isolated castle by two beautiful women who are really vampires.
Unconventional horror in which languid day scenes are punctuated by erotic, violent night scenes; very well done until its rather unsatisfactory climax.
Dir: Joseph Larraz
Stars: Marianne Morris, Anulka, Murray Brown
VAMPYROS LESBOS
1971
0
A woman is seduced by a mysterious lesbian vampire.
Giddy, dreamy horror which makes as much sense as a stuttering Irishman. Occasionally erotic, it’s also hilariously pretentious and desperately languorous, with Franco’s camera, as usual, zooming all over the place.
Dir: Jess Franco
Stars: Soledad Miranda, Ewa Stromberg, Dennis Price, Paul Muller
VANESSA
1977
0
A convent girl has some steamy encounters in Hong Kong.
Barmy erotica that looks like it was made up as they went along (it was, as the director later admitted), throwing everything from psychic sex to monkeys’ brains into the brew. At least it looks nice, especially when one of the many beautiful actresses takes their clothes off – which happens very frequently.
Dir: Hubert Frank
Stars: Olivia Pascal, Anton Diffring, Uschi Zech, Eva Eden
THE VANISHING
1988
***
A man's girlfriend disappears at a service station - he searches for her for three years and finally discovers the awful truth.
Compulsive shocker with a spine-chilling villain and denouement; Hitchcock would have loved it.
Dir: George Sluizer
Stars: Bernard-Pierre Donnadieu, Gene Bervoets, Johanna Ter Steege
THE VANISHING
1993
0
Much less effective American remake which has fiddled with the plot too much and lost the clammy atmosphere; the result is a bloated and unconvincing muddle.
Dir: George Sluizer
Stars: Jeff Bridges, Kiefer Sutherland, Nancy Travis, Sandra Bullock
VANISHING POINT
1971
*
A man is pursued across the desert by police.
Cult road movie whose wilful vagueness and attitude earned it a following.
Dir: Richard Sarafian
Stars: Barry Newman, Cleavon Little, Dean Jagger
THE VAULT OF HORROR
1974
**
Five men trapped in a basement tell of their worst nightmares. The stories are: Midnight Mess, The Neat Job, Bargain In Death, This Trick'll Kill You and Drawn And Quartered.
Appealing anthology with four pithy, reasonably light-hearted tales followed by a longer, meaner one which is also the best; on the whole the scriptwriter takes it easy, not bothering with too much dialogue or sense, but it doesn’t really matter as there’s a fine, starry cast and the original source material, EC Comics' stories, are beguilingly barmy.
Dir: Roy Ward Baker
Stars: Daniel Massey, Anna Massey, Terry-Thomas, Glynis Johns, Curt Jurgens, Tom Baker, Denholm Elliott, Michael Craig, Edward Judd
THE VEIL
1958 (TV)
0
Four weird tales introduced by and starring Boris Karloff.
Clumsily edited amalgamation of four episodes of an undistinguished TV series; flat direction and hammy acting deal the final, fatal blow to the moribund script.
Dir: Frank P Bibas, Paul Landres
Stars: Boris Karloff, Booth Colman, Leo Penn
VELVET GOLDMINE
1998
0
A journalist investigates the life of a bisexual 1970s rock star.
Vacuous and portentous glitz with no period feel, endless gaudy images and terrible acting. The director should watch some films besides Tommy and Pink Floyd The Wall.
Dir: Todd Haynes
Stars: Ewan McGregor, Johnathan Rhys Meyers, Christian Bale, Eddie Izzard
VENGEANCE
1962
*
A slain businessman's brain is kept alive, and tells tales on who killed him.
Decent remake of Donovan's Brain (qv) complete with juicy twists.
Dir: Freddie Francis
Stars: Anne Heywood, Cecil Parker, Bernard Lee
THE VENGEANCE OF FU MANCHU
1967
0
The yellow peril creates a duplicate of Nayland Smith.
Adequate sequel to The Brides Of Fu Manchu, along similar lines.
Dir: Jeremy Summers
Stars: Christopher Lee, Douglas Wilmer, Howard Marion Crawford
THE VENGEANCE OF SHE
1967
0
A girl is possessed by the spirit of the dead Queen Ayesha.
Insipid sequel to She (qv).
Dir: Cliff Owen
Stars: John Richardson, Olinka Berova, Edward Judd, Colin Blakely, Andre Morrell
VENOM
1971
0
A young artist in Germany is enticed by a strange ‘spider woman’.
Hazy Anglo-Euro gobbledygook which just turns into a surreal chase after an arresting start. As is usually the case, its place in obscurity is deserved.
Dir: Peter Sykes
Stars: Simon Brent, Neda Arneric, Sheila Allen
VENOM
1981
0
A kidnap plan goes wrong when a snake is set loose in a house.
Thriller which never quite comes off despite its starry cast and reliable old plot.
Dir: Piers Haggard
Stars: Oliver Reed, Klaus Kinski, Sterling Hayden, Sarah Miles, Nicol Williamson, Susan George
VERTIGO
1958
***
A detective with a fear of heights is drawn into a complex plot involving a woman he once loved.
Many thousands of words have been written about this film and its extraordinary themes, motifs and suggestiveness; it will remain a supreme achievement for many years to come.
Dir: Alfred Hitchcock
Stars: James Stewart, Kim Novak, Barbara Bel Geddes, Tom Helmore
A VERY BRADY SEQUEL
1996
**
The wholesome family gets involved with a habitual thief.
On-par sequel, just as fresh and funny as the first one.
Dir: Arlene Sanford
Stars: Shelley Long, Gary Cole, Tim Matheson
THE VERY EDGE
1962
0
A young wife is menaced by an obsessive psychotic.
Minor suspenser which would have worked better as a full-blooded shocker, a la Hammer horror or Psycho.
Dir: Cyril Frankel
Stars: Anne Heywood, Richard Todd, Jeremy Brett, Maurice Denham, Patrick Magee
VIBES
1987
0
Two paranormal experts are enlisted to find strange, powerful crystals.
Flat comedy with a few bright moments mainly provided by Goldblum.
Dir: Ken Kwapis
Stars: Cyndi Lauper, Jeff Goldblum, Julian Sands, Peter Falk
VICE VERSA
1947
0
A magic stone enables a boy to change bodies with his father.
An attractive idea is transformed into a seemingly never-ending comedy with serious plot gaffes.
Dir: Peter Ustinov
Stars: Roger Livesey, Kay Walsh, Anthony Newley, James Robertson Justice
VICE VERSA
1988
0
A father changes bodies with his son.
One of a rash of these sort of body-swap movies around at the time, this has all the scrapes and head-scratching confusion you'd expect.
Dir: Brian Gilbert
Stars: Judge Reinhold, Fred Savage, Corinne Bohrer
THE VICIOUS CIRCLE
1957
*
A doctor is in trouble when a woman is found dead in his flat.
Intriguing little thriller which gets a tad confusing the more it twists.
Dir: Gerald Thomas
Stars: John Mills, Derek Farr, Wilfrid Hyde-White, Lionel Jeffries
VICKY CRISTINA BARCELONA
2008
*
Two American friends spend the summer in Barcelona where they meet a charismatic artist they both fall for.
Woody goes to Spain, and while the scenery is warm and attractive the drama that unfolds in front of it is rather mild and there’s much that doesn’t convince, in part due to Johansson’s sleepy performance (or is it the script’s fault?). A narrator only further adds to an expectancy of incident that is not fulfilled, but it’s a pleasant summery diversion that’s an improvement on Allen’s last couple of efforts.
Dir: Woody Allen
Stars: Rebecca Hall, Scarlett Johansson, Javier Bardem, Penelope Cruz
VIDEODROME
1982
*
A TV channel gives its viewers disturbing hallucinations.
Idiotic, confusing and unpleasant horror that hardly has the right to take a swipe at video nasties.
Dir: David Cronenberg
Stars: James Woods, Deborah Harry, Sonja Smits
A VIEW TO A KILL
1985
*
James Bond roots out corruption in Zorrin Industries.
Slightly more earthy than its immediate predecessors, this middling yarn showed that it was time for Moore to step aside.
Dir: John Glen
Stars: Roger Moore, Tanya Roberts, Christopher Walken, Grace Jones, Patrick Macnee, Fiona Fullerton
THE VIKING QUEEN
1968
*
The English revolt against Roman rule.
Not-bad-for-a-wet-Saturday-afternoon costumer; the kids would have enjoyed the wee dollops of sex and violence.
Dir: Don Chaffey
Stars: Don Murray, Carita, Donald Houston, Andrew Keir, Patrick Troughton, Adrienne Corri
THE VIKINGS
1958
***
Two half-brothers, one a Viking, fight for the love of a princess.
Exciting, violent and vivid Norseman drama crisply shot in the open air.
Dir: Richard Fleischer
Stars: Kirk Douglas, Tony Curtis, Janet Leigh, Ernest Borgnine. Narrator: Orson Welles
VILLAGE OF THE DAMNED
1960
**
Twelve super-intelligent children with frightening powers are all born at the same time in a small English village.
Taut sci-fi featuring the most chilling children ever put on screen.
Dir: Wolf Rilla
Stars: George Sanders, Barbara Shelley, Michael Gwynn, Laurence Naismith
VILLAGE OF THE GIANTS
1965
0
Naughty teenagers steal a magic formula which makes things many times their normal size.
Hilariously awful mix of teen movie (and virtually every character is one) and sci-fi, a bastardisation of The Food Of The Gods, on which it claims to be based. One long sequence has giant ducks disco dancing.
Dir: Bert I Gordon
Stars: Tommy Kirk, Ron Howard, Beau Bridges
THE VINDICATOR
1986
*
A man is killed in a nuclear accident but brought back to life by scientists.
Slow to start then entertaining sci-fi, all very glossy and hi-tech.
Dir: Jean-Claude Lord
Stars: Pam Grier, Richard Cox, Teri Austin
VIOLATION OF THE BITCH
1978
*
When a girl goes to stay at a Spanish villa, rape and murder follow.
Paper thin sex thriller not dissimilar to much of the director’s previous work but set in sunny Spain rather than rainy rural England; well shot, titillating, watchable.
Dir: Joseph Larraz
Stars: Patricia Granada, Lidia Zuazo
VIRGIN AMONG THE LIVING DEAD
1973
0
A girl goes to the reading of her father's will, and regrets it.
You'll be bamboozled and bored by this appalling reverie which is made even worse by having all the sex [hysterically] cut out of some versions.
Dir: Jess Franco
Stars: Cristine von Blanc, Howard Vernon, Brit Nichols
THE VIRGIN, THE BULL AND THE CAPRICORN
1977
0
A beautiful woman has a husband who strangely won’t sleep with her.
Senseless, shouty Italian garbage sure to give you a headache. Avoid.
Dir: Luciano Martino
Stars: Edwige Fenech, Alberto Lionello, Aldo Maccione
VIRGIN WITCH
1970
*
Two beautiful twins are initiated into the world of diabolism.
Hard to resist mix of sex and horror; visual pleasures range from the titillating twins to the delightful English countryside. Having said that, its tale of sweaty diabolism doesn’t really go anywhere and you’re left wondering where a promising storyline disappeared to.
Dir: Ray Austin
Stars: Vicky Michelle, Ann Michelle, Patricia Haines, Neil Hallett
VIRIDIANA
1961
**
A novice nun is summoned to her uncle’s house and told she can never leave.
Bunuel’s savage satire on religion and capitalism could be in danger of coming across as a silly and confused mess in years to come thanks to its frenzied swipes at many targets, although his criticism of religion may ensure it retains some vitality.
Dir: Luis Bunuel
Stars: Silvia Pinal, Francisco Rabal, Fernando Rey, Jose Calvo
VIRTUAL GIRL
1998 (V)
0
A computer programmer has an affair with an electronically-generated girl.
Trash which should be deleted and sent straight to the Junk bin.
Dir: Richard Gabai
Stars: Charlie Curtis, Max Dixon, Miche Straube
THE VISION
1987 (TV)
*
In the near future, a strange satellite TV company starts operating in Europe.
Curious drama which almost works as a character study or as a warning. At least it's different.
Dir: Norman Stone
Stars: Lee Remick, Dirk Bogarde, Helena Bonham Carter, Eileen Atkins
VISIONS OF DEATH
1972 (TV)
*
A clairvoyant foretells a disaster and is then blamed for it.
Sprightly, with effective moments.
Dir: Lee H Katzin
Stars: Telly Savalas, Monte Markham, Barbara Anderson
VISIONS OF LIGHT
1992
***
Documentary looking at the art of movie cinematographers. The many films featured include Sunrise, Gone With The Wind, Rosemary’s Baby, Raging Bull, The Godfather, Hud, The Grapes Of Wrath, Sweet Smell Of Success, Chinatown and Citizen Kane.
Some have bemoaned the lack of European cinema here – and there is no room for the work of Hitchcock or Kubrick – but this is an insightful and succinct film which makes you appreciate movies more, thereby surely succeeding in its primary aim.
Dir: Arnold Glassman, Todd McCarthy, Stuart Samuels
VISITING HOURS
1982
0
A knife-wielding psycho goes after an outspoken female journalist.
Tediously drawn out shocker which almost could have been a TV movie if it wasn’t for a few slightly nasty moments (that bizarrely got the film on the official video nasties list in Britain). What a truly rubbish script it has.
Dir: Jean-Claude Lord
Stars: Michael Ironside, Lee Grant, William Shatner, Linda Purl
VIVA ZAPATERO!
2005
*
Documentary about a female satirist's attempt to challenge what she sees as political censorship in Italy.
While her satire doesn't look terribly funny, the garrulous lady on show here convincingly makes her point about her government and the implications for free speech.
Dir/Narrator: Sabina Guzzanti
VOICES
1973
0
A couple whose son has died go to an old house where they hear ghostly murmurs.
Stagey, verbose spooky story, too long and inactive.
Dir: Kevin Billington
Stars: David Hemmings, Gayle Hunnicutt
VON RYAN’S EXPRESS
1965
**
Allies attempt to escape from Italy by train.
Slowish to start, but ultimately exhilarating actioner, marred by its downbeat (but memorable) finale.
Dir: Mark Robson
Stars: Frank Sinatra, Trevor Howard, Brad Dexter, James Brolin
VOODOO MAN
1944
0
A strange doctor uses voodoo and hypnosis to try and resurrect his dead wife.
Typical example of just how bizarre Bela Lugosi Monogram horror films could get; fans might enjoy seeing the three stars go for it, and it has a certain knowing campy humour – witness the last line, which mentions Lugosi by name!
Dir: William Beaudine
Stars: Bela Lugosi, John Carradine, George Zucco, Wanda McKay
VOODOO WOMAN
1957
0
A mad scientist turns a woman into a monster.
'Limited' is probably the kindest description possible of this low budget horror.
Dir: Edward L Kahn
Stars: Marla English, Tom Conway
VOYAGE TO THE BOTTOM OF THE SEA
1961
*
As the Earth heats up, a submarine commander attempts to save it by firing a missile at a certain spot.
A lower budget 20,000 Leagues Under The Sea which follows a rather torturous plot route before it finally arrives at its [unscientific] conclusion.
Dir: Irwin Allen
Stars: Walter Pidgeon, Robert Sterling, Joan Fontaine, Peter Lorre
THE VOYEUR
1993
*
A man tries to get his gorgeous wife back and has problems with his father.
Supreme titillation from the cinema’s finest exhibitor of naked women, it could be viewed properly in Britain after the relaxation of film censorship laws in 2000.
Dir: Tinto Brass
Stars: Katarina Vasilissa, Francesco Casale, Cristina Garavaglia
THE VULTURE
1966
0
Dabbling in things he shouldn't, a scientist turns into a homicidal vulture.
After an effective opening, this turns into an extremely daft old clinker with more talk than action. The terribly serious acting is fun to watch.
Dir: Lawrence Huntington
Stars: Robert Hutton, Akim Tamiroff, Broderick Crawford
